WONDERFUL WONDERFUL DAY

This is a great day; our beautiful nephew Jack Trevor (my Dad and Catherine's late father's names) has been born. We're overjoyed ... and far too emotional ... that's me obviously, not Rory! He looks gorgeous and I can't wait to have my first cuddle with the little man .... good times ahead.

I was completely wrong with my guesses for the name - Id thought Trevor would be in there ... but had gone with William or James for first names thinkin they might like Will, Bill or Jim ... I was completely wrong!

I told Charlotte the news when she came out of school and then later told her about a surprise Gran had for her and Jacob the following day. we waited 30 mins for Jacob to arrive home from robinwood. When he got into the car, I said "Charlotte, tell Jacob the very eciting news we have today" .... you can imagine the news she chose as the most exciting - poor Little Jack was a distant memory!!

WELCOME TO HOLLAND (by Emily Perl Kingsley)

Somebody sent me this a year after Thomas was diagnosed and I just loved it - a great metaphor and comforting piece .....

 

He just looks sooooo sweet doesnt he? ... and yet here, he doens't talk or understand much language at all!! Incredible

 

WELCOME TO HOLLAND (by Emily Perl Kingsley)

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible place. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language and you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

I think, years on, one thing that strikes me here is that whilst all the above is quite true, we don't stand alone as islands; we need others to share the positives of our "different place". We are so grateful to our friends who have travelled along with us.

 

What a let down!

What a let down last night felt; Charlotte and Jacob were collected and I listened to their happy chats about what seemed like every aspect of their days at school - good and bad - it was lovely to hear them so stimulated and content.

But then I waited and waited to see Thomas arrive back from school in his minibus taxi before taking Jacob to his dyslexia assessment .... but he didn't arrive and we had to leave. From the dyslexia assessment (which indicated pretty poor progress for a child trying so hard), straight to meeting at school for Jacob's residential next week (... sounded great!) ... Returned home; Thomas in his back to front pyjamas, as he likes to wear them, had taken himself to bed although it was only 6.45pm.

Obviously there wasn't one syllable from him about the day in his new class, with new peers, new teachers in a brand new ASD unit within the school. He was humming and distracted. However, during the evening he was sick (I found the towel, he didn't tell me) and he has been up from 3am .... So, I'm not sure if that indicates anything about his day or not?! .... It feels wrong.

Gordon Bennet - the last week has been absolutely manic ... and I feel like I've catapulted to now with a few minutes to catch up!!

Such an amazing amount has happened.... I guess the  biggest even is that Michelle went into labout 6 weeks early and Henry James Alan was born on Sunday 9th September by emergency section. I couldn't wait to see him; he's just gorgeous - so sweet and perfectly formed ... but miniature. It felt weird walking down those corridors without being pregnant myself and it took a huge effort stop thinking whether there should be a 5th Kidd!! .... BUT NOOOOO!

Henry is just so gorgeous - it's such a miracle - never fails to amaze me!

2 days before that, it was little Martha's birthday - big girl two!! As her birthday fell on a Friday, we obviously had to have fish and chips or Thomas just would not have been able to pull through! .....(if I had EVER imagined 1. that our lives would have been so dominated by "fish and chips on Friday" and 2. the pure joy and intense relief when the big"M" pops into view on long journeys .... I just would not have believed it ... or I would have passed out in horror! ... but there it is!) We had a lovely low key party with Granny and Jack and all Ann Dean's family. Martha was full of fun as always and sang along happily before blowing out her candles.


Playgroup all sang to Martha

Martha got some beautiful nightwear off Gran Kidd and her lovely dress off my parents

Back to school - Thomas!

Hurray! - it's a sunny day; the children are all back to school. Thomas was great and got dressed without fuss (no shoes - but that's just fine - he wore his socks and the shoes went with himon the mini bus).

We had to return the trophy he won at the end of last term for "Child we're most proud of". Thomas was so distressed to be awarded this by the mayor that he lost the plot, wouldn't come out of his seat, crying etc, so the poor mayor had to wade through the children and present it to him practically laid on the floor with the photographer in tow!! ... It was a teary moment for us too .... but I was so pleased that he won the award. As that photograph won't really be one for the wall, and the memory of the event has now faded for Thomas, we were able to take one this morning with him holding the trophy proudly, before we returned it. As mentioned previously, Thomas cannot tolerate the school uniform so he wears his own clothes and sometimes the teachers there are able to change him into the school polo shirt. I just don't understand the whole autistic sensory issue - it's a minefield!

Jacob was eager to be at school early to complete his jobs and Charlotte went happily, looking forward to seeing the new friends she made yesterday.

Back to school for Jacob and Charlotte

Ready for school

We're very proud of Charlotte's hair - 6 years old
and only 1 trim in her life ... very very extremely thin hair

Well, two of the muppets are back to school today. Charlotte came in to us at 6.45am declaring she was "very excited" to be starting her new school and Jacob was very keen to be at school early for his new Year 6 role of putting out lunchbox trolleys. Thomas (up from before 4am last night) seemed bemused by all the uniforms and photos .... not sure how he will cope with starting his new school year tomorrow (Thomas doesn't wear the school uniform - think it's a sensory thing - well it is with the trousers, not sure about the rest ......and I certainly can't see him wearing his new shoes ... let's hope it's dry!)

Martha's Dedication

This was such a lovely day for our family and we had waited so long to be able to celebrate her dedication. We chose Worden Park as our venue and the whole day went without hitch. Our good friend, and former Pastor Pete delivered the sermon and several of our friends were moved to tears with his words. We were so delighted that David and Catherine were there and expecting their first baby. Catherine wrote and read the most beautiful reading for Martha which I will include here when I've worked out how to do it! It was perfect and we felt so incredibly priviledged to be able to celebrate with our friends and family

hkkhgjh

Jacob

Jacob is 10

Charlotte

Charlotte is currently six years old. It's funny ... when it was picked up at school in the Reception class that charlotte might have a problem with her eyes ... I COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EARS!! There could surely never have been a more shocked mother ... in fact the optician must have thought I was crackers ... or downright cheeky ... to think I "advised" her that Charlotte was having us on just because she fancied having some glasses!! In fact she is extremely short sighted and if I put on her glasses, they're so strong I feel dizzy!

Thomas' Swimming

Thomas started swimming 18 months ago. I'd just assumed he wouldn't be able to learn, but such was my fear of him drowning (he'd just walk straight into the swimming pool ... and sink) that we decided to take the bull by the horns and try....... We were so lucky to be allocated to Gareth. Gareth suits Thoms down to the ground; he's quiet; talks and walks calmly, his face is quite clear, he used to wear the same each lesson, enter the pool the same way and start and end the lesson with the same phrases. On occasions when Thomas is very stressed, Gareth glides up and down the the pool with him on his side like a whale (no disrespect to Gareth!).... I always feel better on a Friday when I've watched them together ... 

Thomas is a great swimmer, helped along by his skilled (and very lovely) teacher Gareth. This is them in action ......

Thomas has take up cleaning!! ... of a fashion; the floor was water logged, every shampoo and package opened and spent - the bathroom smelt delicious (very different to how Thomas more often leaves it!) ... maybe toilet cleaning is where his future lies??!!...................

Thomas gets lost at Ecumenical Service at Avenham Park

Thomas gets lost

 

Just to off-load re today, we went to the ecumenical service at avenham park with our church for Preston guild... it was a huge ecumenical service with thousands of people meeting in Avehahm Park along with the general Guild festivities.

 

Its been so upsetting; we took Rory's mum but we lost Thomas; he just disappeared. This is something he does regularly now and several times on holiday our hearts froze over after the usual15 minutes of  fairly relaxed looking for him, then not finding him. Thomas doesn't respond to hearing his name shouted and I don't think he'd know his name if he were asked it. Normally we find him (like Charlotte Moore in George and Sam) just by listening out for him - it is very rare that he is actually silent. 

 

We looked for him for 20 mins as we do, no panic, but then we started running round when we'd established he really was lost - but he'd gone. We reported him to the police but there was little to distinguish him in the description as he'd taken off his distinctive yellow ear protectors. Crucially he would not attract any attention as he'd be as happy as Larry with no realisation that he was lost or in any danger).

 

We gave descriptions (and typically this is the one time we didn't have Jacob with us; as they look very similar and I dress them the same for this very situation; we could have presented Jacob and said "he looks just like that" ... but Jacob had gone into the service with our friend from church.

 

Police all round the park were alerted but they couldn't find him - CCTV cameras etc - ALL over the massive park. Although we weren't panicking, having been through similar situations many times before, it was a particularly unpleasant hour.

 

Thankfully the park had no traffic (always our main concern) but it does have a massive river running along the edge and that really frightened me because like most autists Thomas loves, and is fascinated by water - we never visit the Lakes with him going for a paddle WHATEVER the month or temperature.

 

An hour later a friend from our village phoned saying a friend of hers had found Thomas and was he by any chance lost. They alerted the police at that side of the park and they circled him and moved him away from the river banks.

 

One significant walk later, we were reunited with Thomas .... who was typically completely unaware of any problem ... the policewoman said they had only been able to get to 2 metres of him before he started to get agitated and obviously he couldn't say who he was - but at least they'd kept him safe. If the lovely family from the village hadn't taken it upon themselves to recognise him, observe him and then go to the trouble of contacting someone who could contact us, he'd have been lost for hours.... and our nerves would have been shredded further. It's just such hard work when he continually goes wandering.